A gardener without flowers

My mouth is full of silence that was born since the era that you departed, and the silence is raising to more, much more pain. It is something so powerful that all the things that have nothing to do with it, doesn't mean anything anymore. They were forgotten.
But it so depressively funny the fact that the human being find support in solitude and in the agony of time, that we can stand so much, even when we think there's not much more to stand. Because sometimes eternity touch us, and then we mortals become titans greater than Hercules.
But this is not the way I want to be, this is not the things I want to accept through my whole life. Because it's not good to fell abandoned even if we can stand, and even if we can build lifes and walls against it. Because I want to have you in my life, because you saved my life like Hercules saved Hera. This is what I am trying to scream all along. I do not want a life without you.

Do you know how hard it's been to not give you my hand all these months?
And I don't want to talk about those words we all say that we belong together no matter how many miles are keeping us appart, because that's bullshit. And no games can prove me wrong.

'Cause my love is real, my fears are hard to fight, and loss is solitude as a main dish. And its hard for me to have it, even harder than a beautiful little girl eating soup.